#psychology of hoarding

[evildeerboy]

man it feels hopeless sometimes cleaning your room when you have hoarding tendencies. hoarding has so much shame around it so you know you have to beat it before it gets bad but it’s Always Bad

[transmechanicus]

Woke up from my little power outage nap and couldn’t even manage to eat a full box of macked cheese, grad school will fuck you up for life kids, do it at your own risk.

[blujayonthewing]

thinkin again about the time elyss's DM cut in to stop a conversation between her and a semi-retired player character to hurriedly take back control of him as an NPC before he could give her, as an extremely kind and thoughtful gift, one of his own personal belongings, and then said 'elyss can probably buy it from him though :)' instead

like. what an egregiously fucking shitty thing to do, actually.

[sluttyquarantinetheory]

I actually hate Hoarders (the tv show) so fucking much. Because 1) it pokes a camera in the faces of disabled people and wants us to nod along as it says "isn't this unbelievably disgusting?" And 2) every person who hangs on to anything beyond the most bare necessity for life is always saying shit like "I'm a bit of a hoarder. I hold onto old bits and bobs that might be useful one day."

Like I can not keep having the conversation when I try to explain to people that keeping hold of an old charger that questionably works is not the same as having a debilitating mental disorder and even if it was you do not need to make light of it nor apologize for it. Especially not to me your random coworker.

[whelpimnauthuman]

I know I keep mentioning "oh yeah, as a dragon I was very aggressive/protective and territorial, but keep forgetting until it hits me" but it never ceases to be true

I've been playing VRchat and recently (re)discovered a dragon(ish) avatar with wings for hands. It's great for so many reasons (wings are 100% autistic culture)! But.

You know how people talk about wing hugs all the time? I never really got it. I mean. Yeah, I did to a certain extent - I wanted to wrap my wings around those I care about, and cover them up. Hold my spouse under my wings while we sleep. I guess, in a way, shield them from the world (which, uh, should've already been a warning sign?)

But now? Having wings for hands? Where they're more accessible? I'm suddenly filled with protection I didn't realize I had. All I want to do is hold the people I care about as close to me as possible, keep them under my wings. They're not allowed to leave, random people can't just come over - I have to hold and protect them and shield them from everything. If I could growl and bite and swat away others I would. Ready at the smallest notice to spread my wings wide in threat- "Get away from them"

I can't tell if it's misdirected territorial or hoarding instinct but damn. Did not realize it was that strong.

[raffaellopalandri]

Book of the Day -

Today’s Book of the Day is The 7 deadly sins of Psychology, written by Chris Chambers in 2017 and published by Princeton University Press. Chris Chambers is a professor of cognitive neuroscience in the School of Psychology at Cardiff University and a contributor to the Guardian science blog network.  His research focuses on how the human brain supports cognition and he is also interested in the…

[ilhoonftw]

it is nuts to me how often people praise going to therapy and 'i have been with my therapist for years!' as if in order to make this living less miserable we have to pay someone to listen to you... until you die i guess. doesn't that make you mad??? how much this world sucks and you have to do so much just to survive and the toll it takes on your health is always painted as your own problem... if not even your own fault! you have to fix yourself while the world will continue to go to shite. too many therapists are terrible at their job, face little to none criticism... while people with real trauma from bad experience get written off as stubborn and unreasonable. comments such as 'you just don't want to get better' 'you gave up on yourself' 'you want to keep acting like a victim' are messed up. i don't want to live in a world that burns and being blamed for not thriving in a society that doesn't want to do much about mentally ill people but make crude jokes, overmedicare them and ostracize them because being weak is your own doing. there are bigger issues causing more and more people to Lose It but those issues are never addressed and sometimes some people get paid to keep them going

[bensonnstabler]

heinouslydedicated -> bensonnstabler

my desire to have an aesthetically pleasing canonical(ish) url hath won me over once more

[incorrect-lightlark-facts]

See now this is the kind of quality content I'm looking for

[nappingpaperclip]

does anyone else feel like they’ve never been not stressed out??

like idk…I’ve been chronically stressed since I became conscious. I grew up in an incredibly stressful environment. ever since I moved out I’ve been stressed about school or work or housing or just finding food . There is always something. I’ve never had a break from stress that lasted longer than a day or two. does anyone else relate? what am I supposed to do about this

[adhddbt]

"Hoarders" - Season 12 Episode 8

Terrific example of how this show's ass is completely backwards. Yes, this was a "tough client." Which is all the more reason to reconsider your strategies. What was the big success? So easy for me to predict. It was showing her what the fuck a clean kitchen, bathroom, and bedroom look like.

I've been working on this exact area recently. Get them caught up in the most essential areas: kitchen, bathroom, bedroom-- and they will be far more ready and able to engage with the rest. That was where everything fell down. When hygiene, eating, and rest become difficult, everything else becomes impossible. Getting those three back makes life possible again, delightful even.

Instead, they jump in with, "Were taking all your shit away." They're not actually ready, nor are they properly motivated. The psychologists (if that's truly what they are) have really no understanding of motivation or any depth of the psychological features of these people. I guarantee the vast majority of hoarders have ADHD. Over 70%. The processing differences. Executive function. Decisions. Sorting. Tasking. Time management. Impulse control. Distraction. Emotional regulation. It's ALL there.

So, well. There's surface level motivation, and there's deep motivation. IDK if it's like that for neurotypicals. But superficial motivation is so fucking broke-ass. I'm not even motivated by money, when it comes down to it. And that is a real fucking problem, as I hope you can imagine.

Look, we're not an easy tribe to understand. We've been a mystery ever since we thought it was a good idea (it wasn't) to stop hunting and gathering. There was no such thing as "laziness" until it turned out there were some folks who didn't like the monotony of farming. Go figure, can you imagine? It's the disconnection from the results. It may as well be a bureaucratic dystopia.

"So how long until all this becomes food?"

"Oh, months."

"Fuck. This. Bullshit. Hey, there's a squirrel right over there. Lookit 'em, just eatin' some nuts."

"You gonna go eat nuts? LOL."

"Maybe I'll go kill a couple squirrels, take their nuts, and eat all of it."

"Cool, just keep over there, thanks."

"Oh... I'll be back (for you later)."

"What?"

"Bye bitches!"

[valiant-portabella-pirkko]

KSDJFH your scarlet tags on my tag game are cracking me up. As far as redstone machinery goes, I feel like she would 100% be somebody to troll servers by building elaborate lag machines to lag everybody out. So nefarious of her!!

I'm so glad!! Thank you, yes this is it. You Get It. This is a woman who exists to cause problems on purpose, and she would come up with the most unapologetically ridiculous lag machines known to man.

Your Minecraft server will die to the sound of 10,000 bees spawning simultaneously, and the laughter of an ex-supervillainess who just managed to commit a 'murder' without violating the terms of her parole. Even so, do not fear; your server may be dead, but its memory will live forever in the server crash compilation video she just posted to the Asuranet Holotube server. She's gonna be making ad revenue off that for years to come. Thanks for helping fund her next totally-not-evil scheme! (Shh, don't tell the Commander.)

She was also caught trying to get into Saoirse's Pokemon save files once, and was promptly warned 'If you delete my saves, I'll tell all the gamers where your secret lair is.' Scarlet never touched them again.

[crazykuroneko]

these whole tags by @dreamofme9

you know what I (maybe a tad delusionally) believe to be a trademark louis lie by omission? the "I have neglected my duties and the house fell in disrepair" in ep5. like. the phrasing implies that the house is Like That because louis stopped cleaning, but it doesn't make sense to me that out of the two of them louis would be the househusband in the first place? (I know. race. but then out of all choices made regarding that aspect of their dynamic this one is the most shallow). like, louis is the one who always had servants in the house. this man would not be the naturally-good-at-chores type.

anyway what I'm saying is: both of them have been depressed as FUCK during these years, and lestat wasn't just upset louis didn't want to fuck him. what I would love to see in lestat's account of the events is just. him fucking ruined when claudia leaves. some good old parallels between claudia and gabrielle. him taking a firm "she is not coming back, better deal with it" stance because it's less painful than the alternative ("I miss her, I want her to come back, why does she not come back"), him spiraling further because louis is distancing himself from him too, etc, etc, etc. in conclusion: I think we don't talk about lestat literally dropping a "maybe I should kill myself" mid conversation enough

[yandere-daydreams]

tw - implied non/con, mentions of physical/psychological abuse, obsessive behavior, delusional thoughts, and kidnapping.

Alhaitham is strict.

He's a man of science. He believes that obedience is something that has to be trained, not taught, and that the only way to properly train any thinking, breathing creature is through the continuous and uniform use of punishment to discourage undesired behavior and with-holding of reward until desired behavior is not only seen, but repeated. His rules are firm and unchanging, and when he catches you, say, hoarding mora underneath a lose floorboard or trying to mail a letter of poorly coded pleas for help to a former peer, he feels no guilt as he wrestles you over his knee and delivers a strike for each spare coin he found in your little collection, each word you wasted on someone other than your loving caretaker. He values your intelligence, and that's why he knows you can live up to his suffocating, but not particularly high expectations. He's strict, but really, it's for your own good.

Kaveh is soft.

As soft as crushed velvet and flower petals and down-stuffed pillows. As soft as crumpled silk and grass on a warm day and his heart, whenever you thread your fingers through his and ask so prettily for him to let you go. His greatest in the world is to make you happy, and it pains him to know that, so long as he continues to be so selfish with your affection, you won't be. He'd do anything for you - bring you gems and flowers from each distant corner of the world, dedicate himself entirely to your every whim and desire, carve his own heart from his chest and lay it at your feet - but he knows you truly want is out of his reach. Kaveh is soft - soft enough that, no matter how much it hurts him to see you suffering, he knows the pain of letting you go would destroy him entirely.

Cyno is sweet.

Even if he will admit to taking a certain amount of satisfaction bringing the cruel blade of justice down on those who've earned it most, he's not a sadist, and you've done little in your life to deserve anyone's cruelty. When he does have to hurt you, it's done with remorse, and when he has no reason to, he does not often pretend he has any desire to find one. His affection is silent, but sickeningly apparent. It's expressed through rose blossoms left on your bedside table, trinkets that made him think of you tucked into the pockets of your clothes, the phantom of his lips against your neck - never quite making contact but never drifting away, either. He holds you when you cry, despite being the reason for your distress, and when you beg him for space, he never seems to go very far. He's sweet, even if the tenderness of his love is lost on you.

Tighnari is subtle.

He knows who he is. He knows how he feels about you. He knows that, if he were to chain you up in his hut and do every terrible thing he's imagined, it'd be less than a full hour until you were liberated from his loving embrace and his head was liberated from his shoulders. He has to be more careful than that, more discrete, even if it means spending the better part of one of his few days off piecing together a mix of herbs and serums tasteless enough to be slipped into water and strong enough to ensure you won't wake up the first time he drives his fangs into your skin. Even his more daring moments are limited to a hand ghosted over the small of your back, a strange insistence that he should be the one to look after you when your strange, unnamable illness resurfaces and you inevitably need a professional's time and care. He's subtle - so much so that even you won't know just much he's willing to do to love you.

[atlastv]

"Hoarders: Woman Hoards Her House With STOLEN Items | A&E"